In the office overlooking the rest of the floor, the VP worked. Sixty hour work weeks and stress made her body slim, and her designer suits hung off her frame like silk. At thirty-two, she was the youngest VP in the history of the company. But her ambition didn’t end there.
“Moira,” she called to her secretary.
“Moira!” she said again.
But still, no reply.
“On a call?” she wondered to herself out loud. Annoyed at the insolence of her assistant, she stormed from her office, to just beyond the door, where her secretary sat. She was looking down below.
“Why didn’t you answer me?”
As she asked this, she followed her assistant’s gaze and saw a gaggle of subordinates, huddled excitedly around a new employee.
“Sorry,” said the assistant, “we’ve got a new girl.”
“Who is she?”
“Her name is Miss White. I’ve heard she’s a fresh MBA. Only twenty-five. She’s getting fast tracked into management. Can you believe the higher-ups are doing this?”
“No, I can’t,” she said with disdain.
“She must be amazing,” said the assistant.
“No one is better than me. She’ll flake out under the pressure after a few weeks. Just to be safe, please send Mr. Huntsman to my office.”
Miss White was lead to her desk by a cheerful man. She peaked into other work stations along the way. In the first, the occupant was laying face down on his keyboard, asleep. In the next cube, a miserable looking man sneezed and added to his pile of soiled tissues.
“This is you, sweety,” said her guide.
“Thanks,” she said humbly.
“Don’t worry, you’ll do fine.”
He went on his way, and she got to work.
Mr. Huntsman arrived at the VPs office. His muscles bulged from beneath his suit, his jaw was carved by the muses of Michaelangelo, and he wore his dark black hair slicked back in a modern pompadour.
“We shouldn’t be meeting at the office,” he said. “No one can know that we’re scheming together.”
“This isn’t about that,” she replied.
“Oh. Then, quickie in the conference room?” he asked.
“No,” she said. “I need a favor.”
“What kind of favor?”
“There’s a new girl,” she said.
“Ah, yes. Miss White.”
“Seems like you already have that wandering eye on her.”
“You don’t want me to see her? Look, I like you, but,”
“Don’t flatter yourself. Everyone knows what you are. What I want, is for you to take her heart, and break it,” she said with a smile.
“Sounds like fun. If I do this for you, what do I get?”
“How would you like to be my VP when we take over this company?”
“Big raise?” he asked.
“I think I can do what you asked.”
The lunch break arrived, and Miss White headed to the break room. She went straight for coffee and poured a cup. The break room was a buzz. Another coworker ran up to a man eating at the table.
“I need your help, I’m such a dope! I think I’ve killed my computer,” he said.
“Don’t worry,” the other replied, “that’s why IT is here. I’m the computer doc. Show me what’s wrong.”
The two left the room, nearly bumping into two other on their way in.
With a grin on his face, the man who had guided her earlier was getting an earful. A different guy came to grab a cup of coffee.
“Hi,” she said.
He blushed, finished pouring, and went sheepishly on his way.
“What’s his deal?” she asked as here happy guide approached.
“He’s, well, bashful. Doesn’t talk to anyone. Social anxiety I think.”
“What was that guy chewing your ear off about?”
“Oh, that grumpy bastard hates everyone and everything in this office. It’s nothing.”
“I haven’t seen another girl, yet. Am I the only woman working here?”
“No. The evil queen watches everything from her tower. But the real reason there aren’t any other girlies around is because of him,” he said, pointing as Mr. Huntsman walked in.
“Who is he?”
“The office slut. He uses women. Unfortunately, only women. What can you do? Can’t make a straight man want to taste forbidden fruit. But stay away from him,”
“Thanks,” she said.
As if on cue, Mr. Huntsman headed towards her.
“Hi,” her guide said to him. “Hoe,” he coughed as he walked away.
With a candy bar in hand, and flirtatious eyes, Mr. Huntsman smiled at her.
“Miss White. How are you? Would you like a piece of candy?” he asked.
“No, thanks. I’m allergic to peanuts.”
“That’s too bad. It’s very tasty. Like me.”
“Listen. I’m sure you’re a great guy, actually, I’ve heard nothing but bad things. Anyway, I’m focusing on my career right now. I’m flattered, but not interested.”
“Come on. Just go out on a date with me. Let me show you that I can win your heart.”
“Not going to happen,” she said and walked away.
After finding something strange, she brought it to the attention of the VP.
“Excuse me,” she said.
“Ah, Miss White, do come in. Sorry that I haven’t been able to greet you yet.”
“I understand. I found this error in our system. I know I’m new, but I think money might be missing. I wanted to bring it to your attention right away.”
“I’m sure it’s probably just a glitch, but I’ll look into it.”
As she left, Mr. Huntsman entered the office. He gave Miss White puppy dog eyes, but she averted her gaze.
“That doesn’t look promising,” the VP said.
“She rejected me. Me. I’ve never been rejected before. I think it makes me like her more.”
“You’re not supposed to like her. You’re supposed to break her heart!”
“I tried. I was smooth, I asked her out. I even offered her candy. But she was allergic.”
“Allergic to candy?”
“Well, peanuts anyway. It’s not my fault. One of those little dwarfs down there warned her about my reputation.”
“Then you’re useless. She’s onto us, by the way. She found out that there’s missing money. I’m not ready yet. I don’t have everything in order to frame this on the CEO. It’ll lead back to us.”
“What are you going to do?”
“I don’t know yet. But I’ll have to stop her myself.”
The following day, the VP arranged a surprise birthday potluck for the CEO. She made a special fruit salad, full of apples and other fruits, dipped in peanut oil. The employees gathered together, sang, and started to eat.
“Fruit salad?” the VP asked Miss White.
After a few bites of fruit, Miss White dropped her plate. Grabbing her throat, she followed it down to the floor. Her throat closed and she quickly passed out.
A coworker grabbed an Epi-pen from the first aid kit, and plunged it into her leg. She still wasn’t breathing. The CEO dropped down beside her, and gave her mouth to mouth. After a few breaths, she sat up, gasping for air.
After a ride to the hospital, and an investigation, the VP and Mr. Huntsman’s plans were discovered. Mr. Huntsman betrayed her for a better deal, and they were both arrested.
The CEO visited Miss White every day. Before long, they had fallen in love. And they lived happily ever after.